In a world where relationships can often be challenging, it's reassuring to know that God has a plan for our romantic lives too. God started human history as a matchmaker. He’s still in the business today. Do you believe that? “Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man”. (Genesis 2:22) God first appeared on the scene of human history in the role of a matchmaker. What a profound and exciting revelation! Not only does human history open with a marriage, but it is also destined to climax with a marriage. It is John who paints this scene for us in Revelation 19:6-9. The spectacle briefly depicted by John is one of praise and worship, of feasting and splendor, of almost uncontainable joy, as the almighty God himself presides over the marriage ceremony of his own Son. From Genesis to Revelation, from the first act in Eden to the last act in the heavenlies, the central theme of human history is marriage. Throughout this unfolding drama, God himself does not remain merely a remote spectator - it is he who initiates the action, and it is in him that it comes to its climax. From beginning to end, he is totally and personally involved.
Seek God’s Guidance in Finding Your Partner
Proverbs 18:22 reminds us that finding a spouse is a gift from the Lord. This shows that if you are seeking the right partner, you need God’s guidance. In his teaching about finding a partner, Derek Prince therefore started with establishing a principle of guidance, saying: “There are two kinds of guidance for Christians. One is general and the other is special, or individual. General guidance is the same for all of God’s people and comes primarily from the Bible. Special guidance is individual for each of God’s children, as and when they need it. But you do not qualify for special guidance unless you’re obeying general guidance.”
Cultivate Good Friendships
Acknowledging God's sovereignty is crucial to avoid disastrous outcomes. One of God’s general guidelines is his warning against being unequally yoked with unbelievers (2 Corinthians 6:14). The Holy Spirit will normally not lead a believer to marry an unbeliever. A very practical recommendation is therefore to cultivate fellowship with God’s people. As Derek Prince points out in his teaching: “If you want to marry one of them, make them your friends. If you keep the right company and fall in love, you’ll fall in love with somebody who’s a member of the right company. You’re asking for trouble as a young person to keep company with the wicked and the worldly. Probably there’s a 50 percent chance you’ll end up marrying the wrong person.” Derek Prince goes on to unfold some timeless principles of Scripture that can help to find our God-appointed partner.
You Are Precious
“Realize your value as a child of God. Many of God’s children don’t value themselves high enough. They don’t realize what they’re worth. Ephesians 2:10 tells us that we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus … The Greek word translated “workmanship,” poiema, gives us the English word poem. It suggests a creative masterpiece. You are not just something that God turned out in a casual moment; you are the culmination of all His creative genius and ability. If we don’t value ourselves highly enough, then we’re liable to throw ourselves away on second, or third best. You don’t value yourself highly because you’re so intellectual or beautiful or well-educated or because you’re a Baptist or a Presbyterian, but because you’re a child of God. Jesus says one human soul is worth more than the entire universe. The hairs on your head are numbered. Listen, if God knows the number of hairs on your head, it’s inconceivable that He doesn’t have a plan for your marriage. Understanding our worth as children of God helps us make wise choices in relationships.”
"Realize your value as a child of God... Listen, if God knows the number of hairs on your head, it’s inconceivable that He doesn’t have a plan for your marriage."
Trust God’s Timing
Acknowledging God's sovereignty and allowing Him to take the lead in our lives, including our romantic pursuits, is essential to avoid disastrous outcomes like Abraham's attempt to take matters into his own hands. Derek Prince says, “Here’s the one piece of advice you probably don’t want to hear: be prepared to wait. Most of the great men of God in the Bible were tested by waiting. I’m not saying you’ll have to wait as long as Moses, but he waited 40 years for his time to come. According to Ecclesiastes 3:1–8, there’s a time for everything. God has the time. Trusting in God's timing ensures lasting fulfillment. Don’t wrest the initiative from the hand of God. This is true not merely in marriage; it’s true in everything. Every time you and I wrest the initiative from the hand of God, we run the risk of a disaster. Basically, that usually leads to an ‘Ishmael’. You will remember the story, where Abraham thought God had waited too long. So, he decided to help God out and made his own arrangements. The result was a disaster. So, wresting the initiative from the hand of God will probably cost you a very painful lesson”.
"be prepared to wait... Trusting in God's timing ensures lasting fulfillment."
Belief in God's Purpose
Living by faith and trusting in God's plan for our lives is foundational to finding a God-ordained mate (Romans 1:17). In his teaching about finding a partner, Derek Prince urges us, “First of all, believe in God’s purpose for your life. Believe God has a plan for your life. Romans 1:17 says that the [righteous] shall live by faith. If you don’t have faith, you don’t know what it is to live. Faith is the basis of our whole life as Christians. God has a plan for you. God has no ordinary children. God has no second-class children. Every child of God is special. If you’re a child of God, you’re a special person.”
This article is inspired by the teachings of Derek Prince and aims to provide biblical guidance for those seeking a God-ordained mate in honor of Valentine's Day. If you are interested in more practical and Biblical advice, listen to these podcasts: